How my Husband and Father are alike

I've always heard people say that girls marry guys that are like their father. I remember thinking that was a bunch of bologna. Blake was the farthest thing from my Dad, I thought. Then I married him, and I swear he changed. It was like living with my Dad all over again. Slowly, my Mom caught onto this as well. I thought I'd share with all of you how my Husband and Father are alike.

Number 1. They sing. All the time. I'm not talking normal, radio songs either. These are songs that they've made up on their own. For example, my Dad is constantly singing a song he calls "Rocky Doodle." It's about my dog Rocky, and no joke, I used to hear it about 4x a day. My Husband isn't quite so clever. He just takes radio-songs and changes the lyrics to fit whatever the situation may be. He sings his creations constantly.

Number 2. They likes to pick on me. Matter of fact, a little less than a month into our marriage, he said to me, "You haven't had a molly-whoopin' in a while have you?" (translation molly-whoopin'=picked on/worked over/etc) I've lived my entire life hearing a this similar version from my Dad: "You need to be worked over, don't ya?" The day my Husband said this to me, I could have cried. I thought my days of being picked on were done. I was wrong.

Number 3. They take the looooong way. I've lived my entire life going on vacations with my Dad. Inevitably, we would end up passing an exit, turn the wrong way, or just straight end up lost. After we realized we had messed up, my Dad would drive 5 miles before he would turn around. It drove me insane. On our honeymoon, my Husband did the same thing. Once again, I could have cried. To get from Point A to Point B, they go to Point C first. I don't understand it. Maybe it's a man thing.

Number 4. They talk in strange voices. Everytime I call home, if my Dad answers the phone, it is always in this strange pseudo-Chinese accent. Blake imitates the Tyler Perry character called Madea. I can't even describe it. Needless to say, I already feel sorry for my unborn children.

Number 5. They don't like displays of emotions. Especially crying. My Mom and I are both big saps, and for the majority of my life, we have watched movies while being heckled by my Dad for crying. He will wait and watch for it. And if you cry, be prepared to get mocked. My Husband is the exact same. Lately when we watch movies, if it's a really sad or sweet part, I've noticed that he stops and looks at me. Just to see if I'm going to cry! If I am, he laughs...hysterically. Jerks.

I think I'm doomed. I can't believe I fell into this trap. I still have no clue how this happened. Sometimes, I wonder if I ever actually left home. Dear Lord, please save me.